the search of me

i sit beside lonliness just to cogitate over the one and only me,i close my eyes and i find not darkness surprisingly but many a small n big images.some haunting me, some makin me smile,some seeking me n some mersmerisin me for a while.Perhaps the multishades of life are embracing me all in one ,still i want to figure out myself as a shade alone. The search of me has left me so bewildered.The shallower i thought discovering me would be the deeeper i could see i have drowned now.Sometimes i wonder how did people actually know themselves ,write about own and expose themselves so outstandingly?Mind is still mullin when heart deeply says"the flow of time will do it all". Incredibely abstruse ,bafflingly mysterious still so prepossesing is the hunt of self.What will speak me or what i shall speak out when i am seen is something that is an urge so alluring these days that i somehow want to google myself out and finally attest myslef"THATS ME"....describing myself in position,place,pride,prestige,persona or power is what is the art of the gandhi,marx,tagore or teressa-"the art of the great"...but i am just me.i feel it unworthy giving definitions in the science of the genereal and undeserving in the language of the great.yeah so my heart is write and i need time for the search.but the day it is over i will have my auto-biography out n open...in no big renowned n authentic presentations but in the language of innocence,in the gesture of a baby and finally in the merit of a human bein......i'll be known of a SMILE....yes thats my search..where a smile wil say me all....walkin from today, infact now towards the pursuit of self-realisation....to win the world's most talkative and expressive smile.....there goes ME............................